If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize
