people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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