I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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