Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
