Kareoke will never be a sober sport
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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