so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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