Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
