I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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