You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
