We're like a lot better than the average bears
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
