shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Just invented taco cereal.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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