R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
