i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
