That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize