I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize