The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
