ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
