haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
