Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
