Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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