She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
