google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
