Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
