i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
