I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize