I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
