We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
