never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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