A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize