If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
