yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
