and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
