no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize