Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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