Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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