To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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