It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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