Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
