So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
