so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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