I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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