I'm lost and stupid without you.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
