i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
