hotel room ftw
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
