32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize