Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
