i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
is your mom at the bar?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
