Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
