Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Randomize