YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
