This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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