Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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