So drunk, too bad you don't want this
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
